The Western Regionals...All Things Being Equal

Yep...the Westerns. Tournament of the oh-so-equal-in-a-top-flight kinda way. Equally dangerous, quick, talented, athletic and willfull. This is the Tournament that everyone has gotta see because its all up for grabs in the craziest Regional of '09. Look, I make no secret of the fact that I am a guy that has teams that are near and dear. I play favorites...and I adore the Killer Rocks okay? Cant help it and I cant apologize either. Yes...they are the team I have a soft spot for in the West. They are the team I'm gonna be a silly assed Fanboy over. Frida, Pinky and the Killer Rocks will be bringin it! As will every team in this brutal, evenly matched Tournament. Anyway, on to the sure-fire, cant miss picks!!! Mmmm Hmmm. Suuuuure.....

*All rankings are FTS

1. #24 the Killer Rocks v #35 the Tramps

Come on now...you damn well KNOW who I'm gonna pick in this bout. But even if I was a hardcore, dyed in the wool Tramps fan I would be plenty worried here. The Rocks are gonna be TUFF. Tuscon is a thin 1-2 in '09, with a win over AZ and losses to the Dukies and DEN. The Rocks are 2-3 this year but lost to the Beans, the Dukies and lost a close one to the Pikes 120-113. They had a nice win against Sac City, but Sac C may be on a bit of a backslide. And their other win was against Omaha, a team that the Rocks SHOULD beat. So the resumes are bit vague this time out but I gotta go with the Killer Rocks in this one. Absolutely. Cause I care about my gambled dollar and I'm a silly assed Fanboy for the Rollergirls of Rocky Mountain.

2. #26 the Pikes v #29 Angel Pretty

One in a series of very interesting match ups pits the ole Pikes v Lovely Modelesque Angel Pretty. Ya know...the Angels DO hail from fashionable LA so you damn well KNOW that they're pretty. And they are such a fun fun team to watch. They have mucho charisma and charm no doubt. But I just dont know...my gut is telling me Pikes in this one. The Angels are a nice 3-2, but their wins have come against AZ (what the hell is up with AZ anyway???), the Oranges and the Sinners. The Pikes have a record of 4-5 but THEIR wins have come against the likes of the Killer Rocks (nooo!), Sac C and uhhhh...AZ (Please Derby Goddess lay yer hands upon this lost child Arizona...your beloved mad skating child who has lost her way). And the Pikes beat the Wreckers Greenies too. I just cant shake the feeling that the skaters of Pikes Peak will get past the Adorable Angel Pretty. Which is something of a bummer. Nothing against Psycho and the gang of course but it would just be reeeaal nice to see the Angels win. Ya cant help but eventually fall madly in love with the Angels. Their powers of persuasion and sheer beauty will entice you. They have such a magnetic personality those LA Rollergirls do. But my $$$ says no...go with Psycho and the Pikes. The "Sinister Sisters" are pretty too.

3. #15 Oly v #13 the Dukies

Ahhhh yes...Albucrackee, my former stompin grounds. It seems that I am forever picking against them and sometimes (as in last years Nationals) they nail me. I plan on moving back to the Land of Entrapment someday and I would like to win friends and influence people but there is NO f'n WAY I am going against Oly in this bout. I mean....REALLY? Would you? Lets see...Oly have burned Angel Pretty, the Pikes, Denver (!), the Rosies and Slaughter. Thats a record of 5-0 and they are on a major roll and I cant see picking against them here. The ABQ have lost to some incredibly brutal teams yes, but they have only beaten the Tramps, Dallas and the Rocks (noooo!). Sorry Dukes. Oly is my pick because Oly is RED HOT. SCORCHING HOT.

4. #5 the Rats v #6 the BADasses

Shit. Back and forth I have gone with this predict. Rats! BADasses! Yes! No! Uhhhh...Rats?? Yeahhhh....Rats. That sounds plausible, from a "quality wins" standpoint if nothing else. The Rats have beaten the likes of the Carols, Deeeetroit and the ABQ whereas the BADasses are 1-4 with their lone win coming against Lovely Angel Pretty. Now granted, the BAD losses have come against killer teams (the Muthas, the Rosies, the Beans and...ummmm the RATS). BAD could certainly take this bout, of that I have no doubt. But the Rats are caffienated and ready to kill. The Rats are out to prove that they are back among the elite. They may very well be.

And once again I will try my best to stay on top of things and update and predict. If yer a conservative gambler you had better just stay away from this whole Tournament. You are bound to see some last Jam nail-biters and I wouldnt want ya to have to dial 911 sweatin it over yer mortgage payment that ya laid out for the Rats. Its gonna be epic!! Now GO Killer Rocks!! Love to ya from Zaptown...